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My Son Asked Me How Girls Pee… And We Were in Public

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“Mom, do you pee out of your tootie?”

My family and I were spending a lovely sunny summer day at a local water park when my five year old son dropped this question on me. We were walking from the pool back to our chairs, and he asked it so casually, I almost thought I had heard him wrong.

As a parent, I encourage my kids to ask questions, but don’t children have the most amazing timing? Seriously, dude. This couldn’t wait until later? But it must have been on his mind, so ask he did. He seemed so curious and earnest in wanting to know, that I responded.

“No, sweetie. I do not pee out of my tootie.” (Something I never imagined I would have to say in my lifetime.)

“Do you pee out of your vagina?” he inquired. Oh boy, we really were going to have this conversation.

The funny thing is I had just watched an episode of Orange is the New Black where the women are flabbergasted to learn that they don’t actually pee out of their vaginas but rather a separate hole. I watched that episode wondering how a person could not know their own anatomy. But then, maybe their moms just weren’t willing to talk with them and the girls weren’t comfortable enough to ask. Or maybe their moms didn’t even know themselves. Either way, I wasn’t going to have a son who doesn’t understand how people pee.

I briefly explained that women have a small little hole towards the front where the pee comes from called the urethra. (Thank you Orange is the New Black for reminding me what it’s called.) My son countered my explanation to let me know that he, in fact, pees out of his penis. Duly noted, little dude! And then off we went to enjoy the water park for the rest of the day.

Sometimes I do ask my kids to wait until we get home to discuss things, but there are times you can just tell they’ve been wondering about something for a while. I’d rather my children feel comfortable enough to ask me than to not ask at all. So inquire away, kids! I’ll try to answer you the best way I can.

HAVE YOUR KIDS EVER ASKED YOU AN EMBARRASSING QUESTION IN PUBLIC?

And if you want to learn more about this subject, read this article: Women Don’t Pee Out Their Vaginas, And Other Little Known Facts

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7 Comments

  1. Too many but the way I look at it is that, I would rather have them ask me (even if the timing is off) than not ask me.

    Spoiler alert, they will keep on doing it. Just, the other day my 18-year-old daughter asked a high-school friend of mine about some rumors she heard about me in high school in the middle of Target. Not cool.

  2. Oh my goodness! That’s hysterical (and SO not cool). :D

  3. How hilarious! I can’t remember if my oldest ever asked embarrassing questions, and my two little ones don’t really talk yet. I guess moms have to be prepared for any conversation. Thank goodness fot OITNB! ;)

  4. I agree with you that children should ask (no matter where they are) as opposed to not asking at all.

  5. Oh boy, guys I’ll be having that conversation one day. Thanks, I guess, for reminding me. Although I don’t mind, I believe strongly in learning, it doesn’t mean I won’t be embarrassed. :)

    • There are plenty of times to be embarrassed with kids! I’ve just learned how to roll with it. I’d rather they be informed.

      • Yep, that’s what I’m still trying to figure out how to do more often. I know I’m getting better, though those questions haven’t started coming yet….The curiosity is there though, as Baby Boy now points to Hun’s private and looks/talks as if we can understand what he’s saying….lol

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